Episode 58 – gamergulp.tv Presents Chainsawsuit at E3 2014 (Part 1)


Hey, gamer gang, open wide… this is Kris and Mikey coming at your mouths. Thanks to Gamergulp we’re bringing you an exclusive all-access pass to Electronic Entertainment Expo 2014. We’ll take a look at the hottest games and the coolest new periphs this year at E3! It’s fresh and slammin’.

We’re blasting it out — deep into your body — all exclusively thanks to Gamergulp, the Official Video Sports Quencher of E3, featuring the fresh new launch flavor Contact High. Gulp you some at gamergulp.tv/e3-launch-2014!

This info-packed show features exclusive industry interviews with:

  • Eric Pope, Community Manager for Harmonix
  • Eric Neustadter, Operations Manager for Xbox Live, Microsoft
  • Bill Roper, VP/GM at Disney Interactive
  • John T. Drake, Director of Publishing/PR, Harmonix
  • Cliff Bleszinski, industry personality/video game designer

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12 Responses to Episode 58 – gamergulp.tv Presents Chainsawsuit at E3 2014 (Part 1)

  1. BuyBulkPwnmeal.exe says:

    Really disappointed that Pwnmeal's coverage of the Explicit Electronic Embrace fell through this year, but it looks like Gamergulp found the right Gamerguys (that's trademarked) to pick up the slack!

    Only complaint is that Kentucky Hot Brown Griddle Simulator 2015 wasn't a higher priority, but there's only so much you can see on Day 1. Hope you guys get a chance to check out Crying America Guy: Tears of Blood, the design docs for that look pretty sweet!

  2. Kyle_Douglas says:

    Sweet mother of Mother 3 (aka: Earthbound), DAE remember when Gamergulp had integrity?

    I still have very fond memories of the “Gulp it Down for Rewards” mail-in catalog where I was able to exchange 300 proofs-of-purchase for a copy of "Yamamura Misa Suspense: Kyoto Kurama Sansou Satsujin Jiken" which I highly enjoyed on my Japanese import 3DO. Good times. Great times.

    Granted that was back when Gamergulp was for real gamers and advertised in Nintendo Power, Sega Power, and Amiga Power. Rather than today where it's needing to prop itself up with shady backers like this “Chainsaw Suits for Men” which I'm pretttttttty sure is some sort of money laundering scheme.

    Back then you also had simple, wholesome flavors like “Sonic Furry Blast” and “Mario's Pipe Cleaner.” In contrast, I think the last Gamergulp I had before this latest rebrand was “Diet Call of Duty Ghosts Map Pack 3 Coming May 12th Cola.” Disgusting.

    But at least that was disgusting and accurate. It sounds like these clowns haven't even played “Gauntlet Kingdom Revolution 1.5: Advanced Master Collection”, so how could they possibly understand the rich nuances of all these spin-offs and pre-sequels to that modern classic?

    Still, I'll give these guys a fair shake. Like them, I am also a huge fan of Boss Nass and Figrin D'an (please sign my petition to get D'an into Episode VII at dapostrophean.org). I thought this “Cliffy'B” was also a Star Wars character, but upon further research that's most likely not the case.

    Time will tell if this latest incarnation of Gamergulp turns out to be a Super Smash or a Type-0.

    • Qmzn says:

      "Mother 3 is arguably Earthbound 2" is what I'd say if I gave a crap about television games. Then again, you're probably baiting that fishhook.co.jp with purposeful errors.

      Figgy D'an is no Droopy McCool, is all I'm saying. Imagine the sales numbers if McCool had a Diz-Inf figure. We could be talking double the sales of the Frozen two-pack, the kind of popularity that would force Elsa to make out with Droopy and Figrin just to get back into the spotlight. Imagine that. Imagine what that would look like.

      Then let it go.

      • Kyle_Douglas says:

        Mother 3 is Earthbound 2, but the "Sweet mother of Mother 3!" would be Mother 2, which is Earthbound. No purposeful error there, you just didn't read enough into it.
        Try not to dwell on it, the past is in the past.

        I wouldn't call myself a fan of him, but McCool never bothered me anyway.

        • Qmzn says:

          My tons of friends on my super-secret exclusively gaming exclusive message board have concluded the real mother of Mother 3 is actually a gender-swapped Shigesato Itoi, which is represented in Earthbound by a Mr. Saturn wearing a bow. They also concluded you are a doodie head who uses confuse-o-words, and we're not bringing our SNES over to your house any more.

  3. Qmzn says:

    I ran out of derisive gestures at around 27 minutes. Eye rolling, head shaking, face palming, everything. And now there's going to be two more days of this absurd commentary? *Rolls ey–nope. *Jerking hand m–no, fresh out. *Removes socks*… that… that, okay, uh… that's fine.

    #gamergulp #exclusively #CliffyBDGAF #hangdoganimeassholes

  4. you guys shouldn't have let Cliffy B extreme so hard on the air. It was kinda gross.

  5. Hello, poison control? Yeah, I accidentally got some Gamer Gulp in my mouth. I think I swallowed it. What do I do? What? Oh, just play an airhorn noise? Great, thanks.

  6. @toddef says:

    Gamergulp Official Video Sports Quencher of E3. Extreme fuel to get you to that next checkpoint!

    Gamergulp side effects may include but are not limited to: nausea, diarrhea, blurred vision, memory loss, depression, rapid tooth decay, bloody stool, hay fever, loss of limb control, runny nose, upset stomach, spontaneous fingernail loss. Gamergulp should not be handled by women who are pregnant or who may become pregnant. Not for internal use. Please keep out of eyes and mouth.

    Gamergulp respawn into refreshment!

  7. LMcCJ says:

    Ye gods, is that really what a con sounds like? I'd need the sensory room every 10 minutes.

    It's time for chainsawsuit.com to get with the transmedia. You're ready. Get us while we're hungry (we're obviously not thirsty because of all the gamer gulp).

    Oh and hey, I found the guy on Craigslist who is handling the GamerGulp IPO–I'm in for $1,000–gonna have that college tuition account fully funded by the time PAX rolls around. Go me!

    (Kris, really, next time find a badge that allows access to a bathroom.)

    • LMcCJ says:

      Here's an idea for gamer gulp 2.0 — the can transforms into a unique "disposal" system. Fewer trips to the bathroom translates into more game time, more quench time.

  8. Giggleloop says:

    I'm super excited for all the new possibilities this Gamergulp.TV sponsorship is going to bring! Between extreme gaming oatmeal and gamerfuel e-sports e-drinks, who knows what could be next.. Maybe Stouffer's will come back around (for real this time) with a lasagna tray periph for your Xbox One or PS4 – use all that excess heat to evenly cook your pasta all the way through, all while never dropping out of your Team Deathmatch.

    (Seriously, I'm stoked to hear all of your E3 shenans! Have fun!)

Comments are closed.