face-saving apologies

Apr23

on April 23, 2015

keep your all-important pride intact with these useful apologies that save you time

└ Tags: apologizing, apology, pride, saving face, so very sorry, sorry, sorry about the wiener, sorry kid, sorry pal

Mike

Bless me Father Kris for I have sinned!
MrSing

Well, that wasn't so hard now, was it?
blan44

Hang on a sec, just reloading my apology
*reloads gun labelled 'SRY-47'*
- Atamasama
  
  I hope you get the point of my confession.
  
  Jacketed hollow point, that is.
  - blan44
    
    Execute them with kindness.
Kyle_Douglas

"Only the penitent man shall kick ass"
– Indiana Jones and the Last Due Paid
- stickman
  
  Is that the Indy reboot with Vin Diesel?
  - Kintrex
    
    To be honest, I never really found it believable that Vin Diesel could be Harrison Ford's son.
Grundlegratch

If you could accept my apology by giving me lots of money, that would really help the healing process begin.
Guy from Berrien Co.

Λυπάμαι που θα ήταν πολύ τεμπέλης για να μάθουν ελληνικά και έπρεπε να μεταφράσει αυτό το μήνυμα με τη χρήση του διαδικτύου.
- Code_Monkey
  
  As a greek I accept the apology
  - Atamasama
    
    My Big Fat Greek Apology
- Joe Schmoe
  
  All apologies sound Greek to me. That's why I can't apologize to you… The only "Greek" I know is the bad touch kind.
JJJMo

Sadly, I've been guilty of similar non-apologies at times

"I'm sorry your feelings were hurt / that hurt you" (You're overly sensitive)
"I'm sorry we don't agree on this" (Your thoughts are stupid, and you're clearly wrong…but I'll be the bigger person – like an insult inside a non-apology)
"I'm sorry you didn't understand me" (See panel 1)

However, there are times when I just can't help it. I'm sorry people can't all just agree with me all the time.
- Deeeee
  
  I'm so sorry you're an insenstitive jerk.
  - JJJMo
    
    Look, I'm not the one going around all hurt and crying all the time. I feel just fine and dandy. So clearly the problem isn't me. I'm sorry that is hard for you to accept.
- guesssst
  
  I'm so sorry you expect an apology when I feel no remorse
Tumblt

I give literal backhanded compliments. Like a pimp would.
@ParSpectator

If the bat doesn't work, he has a cannon called "ultima excusatio regum"
- JJJMo
  
  Before that is a caveman club labeled "mea maxima culpa"
  
  Catholic mass latin humor.
The Drunkard Kid

Man, that statue should just accept his apology before he breaks that bat on it.
apologetic

"These apologies seem disingenuo-"

"I'm so sorry you feel that way."
Enlong

"I will not apologize. We're on the Internet. Victory or death!"
- frostyplum
  
  cakeordeath.gif
Chouzetsu

Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa
sheptothemax

I am so, so sorry that you are making me take responsibility for my actions. Let me be clear: I regret doing what I did, now that I know you can hold me accountable for it. Rest assured, I will never let this — you being able to call me out on my terrible behavior — happen again.
Og the Witty

It takes a big man to apologize; cause if a wimpy guy tried any of those, he'd get decked.
bonjovifriday

It's my fault. I know I should feel sorry for what I did, and I hope you can forgive me for not doing that.
apologetic

"These apologies seem disingenuo-"

"I'm sorry you feel that way."
LucidFugue

I'm sorry your face was broken when you were hit.
Commentator

Is this thing on?
Husband

I made a real apology once. Lost my wife, my kids, my home.

Never leave the toilet seat up.
Og the Witty

It takes a big man to apologize. If a little man tried to do any of those, he'd get the spit kicked out of him.
- Og the Witty
  
  There was a big delay in posting so my comment accidentally showed up twice. I'm sorry if you're too much of a neanderthal to appreciate my joke a second time.
  - Joe Schmoe
    
    He accidentally posted the same comment twice, now he's…
    
    Down-voted. Twice?
- ryanbagnell
  
  I apologize that you're so stupid as to not get what the comic meant.
  - Sorryaboutthewiener
    
    Prepare for apology
Suds

Travel tip:

When immersed in the culture depicted in the above comic, it is customary to bleed out at least a half-liter of blood to indicate you have accepted the apology. Broken bones may be expected too, depending on the region.
Busy Apologist

Sorry, I don't think these will save me enough time.
@LMKnightArt

I wonder if Kris was inspired by jeremy renner making one of these the other day after he called black widow a slut.
giggleloop

Am I the only one who is troubled by the "sorry about the wiener" tag…? :)

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