the perfect crime

Oct15

on October 15, 2014

the man on the right went on to become the richest man in the world.

and what became of the guy with the gun who always happened to be standing near him as he simply asked for money? well… *chuckles*… that’s a story for another time.

hi all — you may be aware that i have a patreon for my comics with extras, livestreams, behind-the-scenes stuff and more. you guys are wonderful supporters, and i’m so thankful for you every month. (even moreso with the baby.)

today, i’m also announcing a new patreon for fans of the podcast, the animations, my creepypasta review series and mikey’s own “movies with mikey,” all appearing on chainsawsuit original. it’s in its early stages, but we’re excited to grow it and make even more content on a regular basis. we would love for you to check it out and see if it strikes your fancy!

and no matter what — all my comics will continue to be free to read, just like the podcast and videos are free to enjoy. you are a tremendous audience, don’t ever let em tell you any different.

└ Tags: airtight case, association, coincidences, crime, criminals, gun, i guess he's a robber, law, laws, mugging, order, robber, robbery, the perfect crime

JKB

It's almost like you're trying to say something here, Kris.
- FrancoisZP
  
  i wonder if Mikey owns a gun.
  - MikeyNeumann
    
    Wonder no more! No.
    
    Unless you count all the airsoft guns from Anthony Saves the World … I still have those.
stickman

This is a really good metaphor for that time when a guy came up to me in the street and asked for 20 bucks, while this other guy stood next to him looked angry and pointed a gun at me, and the guy who asked for 20 bucks said the gunman was nothing to do with him, and I asked what the gunman wanted, and the gunman said he wanted me to give the first guy 20 bucks, and the first guy said he didn't condone what the gunman was doing but I should probably do what the gunman said and oh wait what does metaphor mean again? Anyway shortly after that I got shot because I didn't have 20 bucks. It was a bad day.
- krisstraub
  
  whew, i hope you made it out okay! that sounds like a heck of a story
  - stickman
    
    I got shot, so not really.
SamuelAdamsH

That guy whining about "mugging" is just seeking attention! All of this is just about asking for a simple loan and he's making it all about him!
- krisstraub
  
  today i learned muggings are just involuntarily open-term micro-loans
- innerpartisan
  
  It's all just a false flag anyway! I mean, is there any PROOF that the guy with the gun is in any way affiliated with the guy on the right???
Bruceski

Today's strip is a metaphor for endangered species.
Marcus

Don't worry, the guy with the gun is doing alright. He now does panels on Huffington Post and The Escapist.
- Jamboxdotcom
  
  I'd question your definition of "alright" if you consider HuffPo and The Escapist to be indications of "alrightness."
@zarawesome

You don't understand, I'm going to use those 20 bucks to fight evil. Not "guy with gun" evil, though, I can't do anything about THAT.
@Confuciorc

Ah, I see you visited Canada recently.
Gringo

I dub this strip "How Politicians Are Born"
Adam

It seems like this strip would make some people angry, but I do not see them here. Have they sulked away after so many shots at their beloved PUA community? Do they not know how to post? Or do they simply not realize that the joke is about them?

That makes me :(
- Pile Of Wrenches
  
  We're not mad. Just very disappointed.
stephen

I think it's a metaphor for that Obummer dude I keep hearing about. I don't know who he is, but according to the internet he is the source of all evil in the world.
@BrooklynBounder

So.. Is this about using populist scare tactics to try to raise campaign money? It looks like a lot of people are reading into this joke and I'm just trying to fit in :(
- Conic
  
  Given what we know of Kris and the politics he has let bleed into chainsawsuit, I don't think anyone is reading into this.
Bruce

This comic is excellent, but I also like the alternate one I picture in my head where the gunman and the guy asking for money are conjoined twins.

"i'm not associated with this other fella, although we are attached to each other at the butt."
- Chloister
  
  I'm assuming they would be attached right cheek to left cheek. Anything else would make it difficult to communicate while remaining threatening. Imagine the awkward 180 degree shuffle needed between panels 3, 4, and 5!
Jay Blanc

This guy's great grandfather's next door neighbour once had a gun, so really the fault is on both sides.
MagFlare

You want to hold a bake sale, so you rent out a room at the local rec center. Meanwhile, murderers are moving through the crowd and stabbing people to death. Maybe you don't WANT them to. Maybe you RESENT that these murderers are distracting from your bake sale by murdering people. But, at the end of the day, you've sold zero cakes and thirteen people have been stabbed to death. You've got to ask yourself: did you have a bake sale AT ALL? Or did you just have a murder party?
- Bruce
  
  Also the bake sale is raising money to attack women. At least the first one was, anyway. The ninth one might be raising money for journalism camp.
retron23

Two Cops were extremely conflicted about which 'perp' to go after, basically figuring it to be half one and six dozen the other. In the end both were taken downtown for some good old fashioned 'good cop, bad cop' questioning.
LMcCJ

.
ThomasG

man people take things to crazy places
ds_

The banner ad is, "Federal criminal defense." Not kidding.
- TheZark
  
  Aw, man, I just got pizza ads, and now I'm hungry.
@LegendaryFop

You forgot the panel where unarmed rational guy tackles crazy shooty guy and turns him over to the authorities, explaining that he's sorry, he thought it was a squirt gun. NOW can he have twenty bucks?
Stranger

This strip is a metaphor for the Keystone Pipeline debate
Tim

I have read and enjoyed Chainsawsuit for a long time.

I don't think I'm going to do so anymore.
- Roto13
  
  k love and miss u bye
- o0o
  
  hahahaha
flarrghunstow

The only thing that can stop a bad guy who wants 20 bucks is a good guy who has 20 bucks.
Roto13

Pfft, I bet the victim and the guy with the gun are actually the same person.
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the perfect crime

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