the star trek movie idea vault

Feb04

on February 4, 2013

imagine if batman broke his back in every batman movie

└ Tags: benedict cumberbatch, cinema, enterprise, hollywood, j.j. abrams, kirk, movies, ncc-1701, sci-fi, science fiction, star trek, star trek movie, the final frontier is actually crashing on earth

Hortense

I distinctly recall one that did not wreck the enterprise.

There was a whale, and the enterprise was already wrecked at the time.

Can't beat a non-existent horse, can you?
- dylancharles
  
  Ahh, but they showed footage of the Enterprise being wrecked in the previous movie, so it still counts.
  - Hectate
    
    I can see the pitch room right now, some bold scriptwriter in front of the producers, going where none had gone before…
    
    "So in this one, they don't destroy their vessel."
    "At all? Like not even a little?"
    "No. We did that last time."
    "Oh, well show that again then."
DepartureVic

To boldly go where we've gone before! Over and over and over…
RoboGoofers

But there *IS* one other "the whales did it" in there, somewhere.
SwiftAusterity

Hey it could follow the TNG "we're dry on ideas" theme of getting stuck in the holodeck.

Imagine an entire movie of the cast getting stuck on the holodeck.

Yeah, not so bad now, huh.
- William
  
  After a while you'd think the tech support guy would just disable the option to turn off the safety features.
  - Amanda Notaman
    
    What if they retconned that everything prior to this movie took place on a holodeck.
    - SwiftAusterity
      
      If DC comics buys the IP I could see that happening.
      
      Riker got drunk and punched real.. we mean the holodeck.
- Zenbryo
  
  I will unabashedly defend the holodeck episodes. Love 'em. One of my favorite things about the Trek shows is that you never know what kind of story you were about to be told. Comedy, drama, absurd, action adventure, political thriller, spy movie. Big fan.
  - SwiftAusterity
    
    Loving them and them being good for the series are two different things.
    
    They're like almost every Q episode. They divert entirely from the general flow of the series and actually make little sense at all other than the "it's in a holodeck" plot device.
    
    There's little investment in any of the characters other than "escape" and "don't die".
    
    It'd be like if Sam and co. from Cheers started an episode in a cave in a prehistoric era and spent the hour fighting off a t-rex. It makes little sense.
    - Code Red
      
      Remember the episode on the holodeck with Q? I'm sure Picard was dressed as Robin Hood in that one too.
      
      Don't recall if Riker got his trombone out or if Data mused on the mysteries of humanity as well. Probably.
    - Jabberwok
      
      Granted it makes little sense, but I would be a hundred times more likely to watch a Cheers episode that involved fighting dinosaurs.
- Rick
  
  TNG holodeck episodes, yes. DS9 holodeck episodes, however, were gold and actually served to move the plot forward.
Sam

One in every three is "Kill Main Character"
- BabyBrendt
  
  and then, backsies
Dan H

Am I the only one that thinks it looks like the NX Enterprise is crashing in that clip? Maybe it's like a museum ship Battlestar Galactica style and Khan takes it down.
CHRIS B

there are plenty of letters left in the alphabet.
Captain Chipmunk

The Voyager version is "eject the warp core", and "suck".
Biz Markie

I'm not saying this moving is going to be joint because of Benedict Cumberbatch, but it's certainly the reason I'm checking it out in the theater.
Angry Police Chief

Dunno why there's so much ceremony over building and launching them, they're like action movie cop cars.

"Dammit Kirk that's the 2nd Enterprise you've wrecked this week!"
- NiK
  
  I read that as "the 2nd Enterprise you've wrecked this Universe!" for some reason… I'm not sure which version I like better.
Scrotumancer

This one time I called Benedict Cumberbatch "Cummerbund Bandersnatch." Now sometimes I can't remember his real name.
- Jon
  
  Godammit, now I'll be calling him that.
  - Silverback
    
    This is the worst communicable… thing… since the Ring video tape. Thanks a lot, Scrotumancer.
NikNaks

2015: "Wreck the Millennium Falcon"
@mygiantrobot

BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH. That is all.
Amanda Notaman

If I could only rummage in that vault for a day, what treasures I would find!
James

Screenwriter Terry Rossio actually has written about this before and gave it a name:
SES – Starship Enterprise Syndrome

Very good article about it here: http://www.wordplayer.com/columns/wp08.Impressive…
Zenbryo

The Enterprise is the "Kenny" of the Star Trek universe.
RoboGoofers

The film treatment for "you will always have good luck in your personal affairs" turned out to be really good, but had to be discarded as non-cannon when they realized it was just a fortune cookie fortune that had fallen into the cage.
Azurist

You might not be able to see it, but there's one slip of paper in the top-left corner that reads 'save the whales' instead.
Snow_Dogs

It's only fair since the series "Enterprise" wrecked the Start Trek universe.
Prior Semblance

Well it makes sense, the bad guy wouldn't be very dangerous if he couldn't damage one ship.
- FanMan
  
  On the flipside, the crew isn't very good if they can't not crash one ship…
  - Hectate
    
    They must be really good then, because I've lost count…
D, just D

The thing that bothered me the most about this trailer was the "take a deep breath, now scream" part. That lady puts a lot of forethought into freaking out.
- djublonskopf
  
  Just before the shot that made the trailer, she and Uhura were arguing about who is the best at screaming.
  
  Uhura wins, but only because the Enterprise crashes during her turn.
Kit

Batman DOES break his back every movie. He just doesn't usually whine about it.
Mathis Phoire

I accidentally crashed the Enterprise twice. Now I'm… in another sequel.
Xochi

You forgot the age old super secret star trek movie idea.

Reverse the polarity.
jelliot96

There is actually one slip in there that says "wreck the franchise." Everyone is a little apprehensive about what'll happen when they draw that one.
- Frankie D.
  
  Too late!
- Rick
  
  On the back, it says, "Let Shatner direct."
  - Sporty Thieves
    
    I want that on a bumper-sticker.
BaronUberstein

The music sounded kind of like the Inception music to me. Just BLAAAAR. BLAAAAAR. BLAAAR. ACTIOOON. BLAAAR!

>_>
- GrownUpOrphan
  
  I haven't seen Inception, so I hope you don't mind that I played your BLAAAARing to the them from A Space Odyssey.
- Jor-El
  
  That's the new default "music" for movie trailers now.
  
  See also: Prometheus, which was the same thing but in a different key.
  - djublonskopf
    
    There's a key to that?
    
    I would love to see that musical score. "BLARRRRRRRR in the key of F-minor."
  - Kriss Kross
    
    that shit was bangin
Rick

The movies are just following through on Kirk's threat to self-destruct every time an alien set foot on the bridge in TOS.
Rick

Not counting Spock: "Of all the souls I've encountered, his was the most … human."

Kirk had hella issues, multiculturally.
RevGonzo

I'm sensing a new "Saw it For You."
Jor-El

Its just the easiest way to show how badass the bad guy is. Yeah, in a TV episode you can just have the bad guy throw Worf into a wall, but in a movie? You need to take that up a notch.
- CWR
  
  "So then, he, ah, throws the ENTERPRISE into, no! THROUGH A WALL. And it lands in the Atlantic, no! THE PACIFIC OCEAN. And it's all BWWAAA BUWWAAA onna soundtrack, an-" *dies twitching like an electrocuted Chihuaha*
  
  Studio Head "I like, no! I LOVE IT." *commences dry-humping the cooling corpse*

the star trek movie idea vault

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