i am fortunate to have been able to stay at a fancy hotel once in a while. but here are the differences between a regular hotel and a fancy hotel:

  • at regular hotels, the internet is free
  • at regular hotels, you can close a door while you go potty
  • this door is also opaque and not (a) delicately frosted or (b) an austere glass portal through which can be viewed the ultimate intimacy
  • and no one in the lobby glares at you if you are meeting the papa john’s delivery boy down there
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