Saw It For You: Gravity (2013)
We here at Saw It For You are psyched to reveal the secrets behind Gravity, the highly anticipated space thriller from Alfonso Cuaron. It won’t be in theaters until October 2013, but we found a near-complete work print of the movie while breaking into a condemned Winchell’s Donuts in Burbank, California. This modern-day sci-fi tale’s striking visuals and heart-pounding action sequences will leave you breathless… and gravityless.
Synopsis. When a cloud of “meteorbs” destroys a shuttle on a mission to the International Space Station, two astronauts must fight for survival against zero gravity and a dwindling oxygen supply.
- Every spoken instance of the word “meteor” was redubbed in post production by having all the actors add a “b” sound to the end. Director Alfonso Cuaron mistakenly believed NASA had trademarked the word “meteor.”
- To ensure accuracy in front of greenscreens, actors George Clooney and Sandra Bullock trained for six weeks in an orbiting NASA space shuttle which Cuaron carefully sabotaged. The footage — much more realistic than the CGI used in Gravity — was lost in a Christmas tree fire.
- According to producers, Clooney took some cajoling to take part in the film, as he does not believe in space.
- An early version of Gravity featured two deep-sea divers surviving the wreck of a submarine, but test audiences had so much faith in the United States Navy that the idea of “something going wrong underwater” was considered too ridiculous.
- Included in the press kit are instructions to watch the movie while nauseated and/or being asphyxiated, for maximum enjoyment.
- In interviews, Cuaron has called Gravity a wake-up call for America, warning us of “an impending space 9/11 brought on by meteors: nature’s terrorists.”
- The International Space Station does not have a lawn.
- Having no measurable effect on one’s angular velocity, Dr. Ryan Stone (Sandra Bullock) would not be able to dodge micrometeorite strikes with a series of well-timed burps.
- Director trademark. No sound in space except for Robocop noises when astronauts move.
- Astronaut rations do not contain circus peanuts, not even “as a special treat.”
- Prop snafu. Before the first space walk, astronaut Matt Kowalsky (George Clooney) puts his space helmet on upside-down.
- Contrary to what Mission Control tells the astronauts, the vacuum of space is not “good for two or three deep breaths, tops.”
- Incorrectly regarded as goof. Though improbable, a stream of urine might in fact freeze hard enough in space to create a needle that could be used to stitch a tear in a spacesuit.
- Director trademark. Space discussed as if it’s black twinkling fluid that must be kept out of the shuttle.
- Continuity. In the airlock when Stone and Kowalsky are prepping NASA’s experimental two-person sex suit, the hard-on detector reads zero even though the astro-bang aperture is fully dilated.
- Plot hole. There was no reason given for the space shuttle to have had a cargo bay full of bowling balls.
- Technobabble. Historically, astronauts do not refer to the moon as “our cold sun.”
- An astronaut’s space walk gear does not include a bandolier of grenades.
- Scientific Screwup. The fact that there is no heat in space does not mean that people working and living in space would completely forget the concept of heat.
- Throughout the film, characters in spacesuits occasionally stroke their chins or scratch their brows with a third, ungloved hand that appears inside their helmets.
- Incorrectly regarded as goof. Though to date it has not been true, Gravity may take place in a very near future where NASA extravehicular spacesuits include a breast viewing window.
- Director trademark. Starving astronaut mashing food onto their visor in futile attempt to eat.
- The movie never reveals “the sons-of-bitches that sent those meteorbs,” referred to by Kowalsky multiple times. This may be a holdover from an earlier edit left on the cutting room floor.
Dr. Ryan Stone. What do I do? What do I do?
Matt Kowalsky. Don’t panic! If you panic, the meteorbs win.
Dr. Ilyich Vladovoskaya. It’s no good. Orbital decay will consume the ISS in hours. We must man the escape craft.
Dr. Ryan Stone. You’re insane. We’ll lose six years’ worth of data on insect zero-G atrophy.
Dr. Ilyich Vladovoskaya. You are willing to stay here and die with 10,000 crickets?
Matt Kowalsky. We’re Americans. These colors don’t run.
Matt Kowalsky. Space is flooding the cargo bay. In a few minutes it’ll breach the airlock too.
Dr. Ryan Stone. I can feel it getting colder already. We have no choice. Get into the two-man sex suit.
Matt Kowalsky. You sure about this, Doc?
Dr. Ryan Stone. There’s no other way, Kowalsky! We’ll have to fuck our way through the ionosphere!
Zorganorph. Jumpin’ jeepers! (deleted scene)